Facebook is a double-edged sword. On the one hand, if you are not on Facebook, people have normal and reasonable reactions like, "WHAT? YOU AREN'T ON FACEBOOK? EVEN MY GRANDMA IS ON FACEBOOK! SHE'S MY NEIGHBOR ON MY IMAGINARY FARM! AHHHHHHH!!!!" That's what they scream at you, verbatim probably. On the other side of the sword, Facebook is the worst.
I just don't understand what exactly the purpose of Facebook is. It just seems to be a place where people update about how they don't like being sick or how their kid likes peas now and everyone else updates the same things and everyone just keeps on doing that all day every day and everyone seems to "like" it all for some reason. I know I'm not the first person to point this out, but did the other five million people who pointed this out ever get an answer?
I mean, inviting every single person you have ever had contact with, including the people you attended kindergarten with 20 years ago, to your Christmas sweater party - OK, I guess. Or keeping track of the birthday of someone you met on vacation in 2003. So, Facebook is a nice address book.
But last year Facebook became the MOST POPULAR SITE ON THE ENTIRE INTERNET (in the U.S.)! Even more popular than this blog! For what, exactly? Because it's a good address book? Because of "Restless leg syndrome is mean! Repost this if you don't like restless legs!" "837 people like this."?
And now I dread big sporting events and American Idol finales for a reason other than themselves: EVERY SINGLE PERSON has to add their two cents. That's an accurate figure. The dumb rapture? Oh brother, so many interesting updates about the rapture.
Or the weather. "Dear weather, I wish you would send the sun out today! Thanks, Mike Kostyo." Good job. Good status update. Would you believe that people don't like when the weather is bad but like when the weather is nice? Someone should do a study. It's been getting hotter here in Boston (summer), which is something I noticed using my senses, but everyone on Facebook will be happy to tell you as well. "So happy to see the sun out." "Finally, some nice weather." If somebody called you up and said that to you, or sent you an email message about how they are glad to see the sun, what would your reaction be?
The only thing that will make hot weather and the relentless updating of pictures of people's cats sitting around more bearable is dulce de leche almond ice cream (switching gears!). This may be the best ice cream I have made yet. And it's so easy it's a joke. It's not a joke! If you can find it, you have to get La Salamandra brand dulce de leche. Not even IF you can find it. Just find it. Just get it done, detective. La Salamandra dulce de leche is to the best as Facebook is to the worst. It's kind of expensive, but I'm telling you, spend the money, it's worth it. I bought mine at Whole Foods, but I've heard you can find it at Williams-Sonoma and you can even order it from Amazon. Just buy it. Then make a status update about how hard the jar is to open or something.
dulce de leche almond ice cream
adapted from gourmet may 2007
+ 1 1/2 cups skim milk
+ 1 1/2 cups heavy cream
+ pinch of salt
+ 1 16-ounce jar La Salamandra dulce de leche
+ 1/2 teaspoon vanilla extract
+ 3/4 cup slivered almonds, plus extra for sprinkling (toasted if you prefer)
In a medium saucepan, bring the milk and heavy cream to a low simmer. Remove from heat.
Add the pinch of salt and dulce de leche. Whisk until the ingredients are dissolved and the mixture is smooth. Whisk in the vanilla.
You can chill the mixture using two different methods, depending on your patience. If you are not in a hurry, simply transfer the mixture to the refrigerator and chill overnight. Otherwise pour the mixture into a metal bowl placed into into a larger bowl filled with ice and cold water. Stir until the mixture is cold.
Pour the mixture into your ice cream maker and churn according to your model's directions. When the mixture is just firm, pour in the almonds and mix until just combined.
Transfer the ice cream to a container and freeze for at least an hour. Serve with sprinkled almonds over the top.
makes about a quart and a half